Marvin Humes and Rochelle Wiseman engaged!

It's a match made in pop band heaven! JLS hottie Marvin and The Saturdays stunner Rochelle are getting married!

After a relationship which has been fairly plain-sailing by celeb standards - only one major breakup - the pair have taken things to the next level as Marvin popped the question in Barbados.

The happy couple both tweeted their happy news in order to let their fans know directly, rather than through any dodgy pictures or speculative articles.

Best of luck to them both! This eases my Brand/Perry split agony by exactly 3%.

I'll leave you to enjoy this picture of the gorge pair on their romantic holiday, and Rochelle's HUGE diamond sparkler! The ring is from fancy jewellers Boodles, and reportedly set the Marvster back a cool £50,000! Wowza!

C xxx

Katy Perry and Russell Brand file for divorce!

My life is over. That's it. Never again will I believe so much in a celebrity marriage. I am in shock.

Katy Perry and her husband of 14 months, Russell Brand, have split. Russell filed for divorce, citing 'irreconcilable differences'.

The pair, whose whirlwind romance saw them engaged within four months of meeting, and married ten months after that, have been the subject of speculation since their relationship began.

Personally, I've tried to avoid throwing negative comment on their relationship; favouritism, I know, but it's my blog and I'll favouritise who I want to!

Throughout their short marriage, Katy and Russell have spent long periods apart; he was filming the semi-ok film 'Arthur', while Katy was on her California Dreams world tour.

Russell's comment on the divorce was simple. He just said "Sadly, Katy and I are ending our marriage. I'll always adore her and I know we'll remain friends."

I'm genuinely sad for these two. They seemed so well-suited, in love and happy, but for the huge press intrusion in their lives. It's a sad day in the office at MCLairy Towers...

C xx

Lindsay Lohan has a modelling job!

After her recent Marilyn Monroe-inspired Playboy shoot, Lindsay Lohan has moved on to modelling for Jag Jeans, rocking a teeny tiny pair of hotpants and her usual fingers-in-the-mouth sex face.

Not going to lie, I love a bit of Linds, I really do.

This shoot was photographed by the same guy who did the Playboy shoot - Yu Tsai - who was clearly impressed by Lindsay's poses.

A press release from the shoot reads "As Jag Jeans' newest endorser, Lindsay embodies the strength and fearlessness of the woman of today. She is unafraid to be who she is. She is fierce yet exudes feminine grace."

I'll reserve judgement on the grace, but I'm massively excited for the return of the Lohan after her latest glowing probation report and the super-high sales of her Playboy issue.

C xxx

Ain't no dirt on THOSE shoulders.

This is officially my favourite picture in the entire history of the world.

There aren't words to describe my love of Kate and Wills. I'm not usually one to go all gooey-eyed over the monarchy, but they're just sort of...normal. And that's cool!

The young royals got down with the people at the homeless shelter they visited to make some lovely Christmas cookies for the 18th birthday of a resident! I wish they'd visit me, but alas, I have no landmark birthday or worthy cause.

Wills's technique is worthy of Jay-Z himself, while Kate looks like she's having a TOTES AMAZE time, laughing at her husband's expense.

C xxx

Angelina buys Brad the best birthday present ever

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt clearly like to keep things fun - Angie was recently spotted buying Brad a swearing parrot toy for his 48th birthday!

The toy is called Polly the Insulting Parrot, and Ms Jolie bought it at a toy shop in Vegas over the weekend.

The shop manager stated that 'There were 200 people in the store and they all froze when she walked in and just watched her shop.' That's a bit creepy, if I'm honest.

Anyway, I hope Brad liked his filthy-mouthed parrot pal. Do you reckon there's still enough time to get one shipped to the UK for Christmas?

C xxx

David Beckham: Angry.

David and Victoria Beckham are reported to be FUMING at the 'select group' of journalists they sent a private family Christmas card to after pictures of it popped up all over Twitter.

The family snap featured the four adorable mini-Beckhams sat in bed, while the back of the card read 'Picture by Daddy' - which is the CUTEST THING EVER.

I can understand that the Becks family didn't want the picture to become public, but I must say...If you don't want something to become public, don't send it to a whole bunch of journalists! There is no better way to ensure that something will instantly be shown to the most people it is humanly possible to show. Not one.

I think there might be a few people struck off the Victoria and David Official Xmas Card List next year. But - if you're reading this, Victoria and David, I would NEVER do such a thing. So feel free to send me stuff!

C xxx

Rihanna does not take kindly to public racial slurs...

After Dutch magazine Jackie printed an article about Rihanna, calling her a 'n**** bitch', the singing superstar hit back at Editor Eva Hoeke over Twitter.

Rihanna responded to the article in her usual highly effective, to-the-point style, saying;

"I hope u can read english, because your magazine is a poor representation of the evolution of human rights! I find you disrespectful, and rather desperate!! You ran out of legit, civilized information to print! There are 1000's of Dutch girls who would love to be recognized for their contributions to your country, you could have given them an article. Instead, u paid to print one degrading an entire race! That's your contribution to this world! To encourage segregation, to mislead the future leaders to act in the past! You put two words together with the intent of abasement, that made no sense…"N**** BITCH"?!….Well with all respect, on behalf of my race, here are my two words for you…FUCK YOU!!!"

Wow.

To be fair, if I was Rihanna, I'd be just as angry. Hell, I get almost that angry when someone spells my name wrong, so god knows what I'd have done in her shoes.

After a particularly rubbish 'IT WAS ONLY A JOKE!!!! HA!! ha...ha?' type apology, Eva decided, probably wisely, to quit as Editor of Jackie after everything blew up. Defos the best option, I think!

C xxx

Lauren Goodger's gonna wash that man right out of her hair

This is the hair tend that just won't die, isn't it?

The Only Way Is Essex's Lauren Goodger emerged from a marathon session in the salon yesterday to show off her new dip-dyed locks.

While I like the look when it's sported subtly by J.Lo, or with a cool edge by Rachel Bilson, Lauren's mane is just a bit too...obvious. The colour change looks very Stacey Solomon/Giuliana Rancic from a few months ago, and it ain't pretty.

I wish Lauren had gone for the glossy, healthy-looking brunette she's got on the roots all over. It would look much more expensive and be far more versatile. She's got a pretty face and lovely eyes, which dark, luscious hair would really bring out.

She might be trying to colour Mark Wright out of her life, but I don't think this is the way to go.

C xxx

Emma Watson's brother to join Made In Chelsea cast?

I sense a family row coming on.

Emma Watson, of Harry Potter fame, must be SO annoyed at her younger brother Alex if rumours that he has signed up for the third series of reality show Made In Chelsea are true.

Show regular (although she seems to be increasingly not in it) Amber Atherton has said;
"The producers think it would be amazing to get Alex on the show. He's good-looking so he'd make great competition for Spencer."

How. Embarrasing. For a young woman with Emma's credentials, a Reality TV-famous sibling using her name to get on a trashy programme must be a bit annoying.

Adding to the general awkwardness is the fact that Emma was recently revealed to have had a fling with Chelsea cast-member Francis Boulle, who claims to have dumped Miss Watson because she's too famous!

Totes Awks.

C xxx

Frankie Cocozza axed from The X Factor!

Wannabe rocker Frankie Cocozza has been kicked off The X Factor.

The unprecedented move comes after he allegedly boasted about using Class A drug cocaine in front of production staff. Clever. Not taking drugs is one of the 'Golden Rules' of the show, and having broken this rule, Frankie had to go.

Although his legions of teenage fans will be devastated, it's probably for the best that he's gone - for him and for the show.

Frankie released a statement, saying;

"I'd like to apologise to Gary, my fellow contestants and everyone who has voted for me, but, as of today, I will no longer be in the X Factor.

"My life during the show has gone out of control and my behaviour off stage has over-stepped the rules of the competition. I no longer deserve my place in the show, so I am therefore leaving.

I would like to thank everyone who has supported me."

Well, it's a fine way for him to show it. It's one thing being Jack the Lad and taking recreational drugs in your normal life, if that's how you choose to live. It's another thing entirely to break an explicit rule of the competition that's giving you an opportunity to be successful and famous (...at least for six months) at the expense of others.

At least he had the decency to apologise. If he really has a problem, and hasn't just been caught having a cheeky one, then I sincerely hope he gets the help he needs. As a young guy, he's got a better chance than most to knock any burgeoning habits on the head. Best of luck to him in getting sorted.

The current gossip swirling around is that an eliminated act - Johnny Robinson or The Risk, most likely, will be able to fill the place and have another chance to prove themselves.

The X Factor representatives are refusing to make any announcements until tomorrow, so watch this space...

C xxx

Is Kim trying to patch up her marriage?

Even though she only went 'into hiding' this week, it is now being claimed that Kim Kardashian is attempting to patch things up with her sports star husband, Kris Humphries.

TMZ managed to snap the starlet on her way through Minneapolis-St. Paul Airport at 5.30am this morning. And who lives in 'Sota? Mr. Kris Humphries.

Although there's no solid reports of reconciliation, there have been murmurs since Kim filed for divorce that she wasn't ever completely sure about ending her marriage.

Personally, I don't think you can know if a marriage is going to work after only a couple of months, so I'm not surprised that Kim may now be having second thoughts...

C xxx

Kate Middleton sparks pregnancy rumours in Copenhagen

Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, sparked rumours that she might be pregnant yesterday in Copenhagen.

The royal fashionista refused the offer of tasting the peanut paste used in UN food parcels. Prince William, the Danish crown prince, and his wife happily ate the food, which is used to help people in famine-stricken areas.

Doctors advise pregnant women to avoid peanuts and all their by-products in order to prevent any allergic reaction.

Kate's spokeman confirmed that the Duchess herself is not allergic to peanuts, further adding to the rumour mill that there may well be a royal baby on the way.

If Kate is pregnant, then that child, regardless of whether it is a girl or a boy, will be in line to the throne thanks to recent law reforms that give female children the same succession rights as males. Exciting!

On the other hand, Kate's famously tiny waist showed absolutely no sign of expansion, so you know...she might just not like peanuts.

C xxx

Where in the world is Kim Kardashian?

Since filing for divorce from her husband of 72 days, basketball star Kris Humphries, Kim Kardashian has been under some intense media scrutiny.

The queen of reality TV initially looked to be getting on with things, flying out to Australia to promote her line of handbags. However, since quitting her promo tour, Kim K has gone into lockdown mode.

She arrived at LAX yesterday, only to be faced with a barrage of paps. Kimmy jumped straight into her car and drove off, with the photogs in hot pursuit. Sneaky Kim managed to pull a fast one by switching cars halfway through the journey, meaning that she managed to lose the press and hole up in a secret location.

Sources close to the Kardashians have said that the plan is for Kim to remain in hiding until she starts work on a film.

A film called 'Marriage Counsellor.' I literally couldn't even make that up if I tried. It's too perfect.

C xxx

Jedward do Eurovision...part II

I am so excited right now.

While I have been snowed under doing work that actually pays my bills, some earth-shattering news has been revealed.

JEDWARD. ARE. BACK.

After their storming performance in this year's Celebrity Big Brother, the loopy duo have revealed that they plan to build on this and their success in central and eastern Europe by competing in Eurovision for the second year in a row.

Last year, the boys dazzled us all in their glittery jackets, bouncing around the stage to Lipstick. I, for one, can't wait for round 2. I am an out and proud Jedward fan. They are amazing. They are fun. They are in no way serious. They know their lack of genuine talent, but they go for it anyway.

In a nutshell, Jedward ARE Eurovision. If they can restore Ireland to their Eurovision success heyday, I will love them even more. Let's face it, the UK is never going to get anywhere, so I may as well root for my ancestral home.

John, who rather unfairly is only represented by the 'J' of Jedward, said;


"Guess what? We're gonna be doing Eurovision 2012. It's totally awesome. We did Eurovision 2011 and since we did that we're known all across Europe and all across the world.

"And next year it's gonna be even bigger and better because we're in all these teen magazines, and we go all over Europe.

"Our song and album and everything is doing really well in all these countries, and we're really excited about doing Eurovision 2012."

Good luck, crazy boys!

Sarah Harding checks into rehab!

Girls Aloud singer and celebrity cainer Sarah Harding has checked into an undisclosed rehab facility for treatment for depression and alcohol addiction.

Sarah has always been a party girl, but unfortunately, her love of a night out has taken a turn for the worse, exacerbated by depression following her recent split with her ex-fiance, DJ Tom Crane.

The Sun quotes an 'insider' as saying "She's been through a traumatic time in her personal life and had to honor her work commitments on top. She needs some time out to clear her head. It all just got the better of her. She had been with Tom for a long time. All her plans for the future suddenly came crashing down. She was burying her head in the sand, but now she is getting support."

All the best to Sarah, and hopefully she'll be back on track ASAP.

C xxx

Francis Boulle and Emma Watson were an ITEM?

Oh. My. Goodness.

Made in Chelsea's Francis Boulle (who I ADORE, by the way) has spoken out about his 'bit of a thing' with Harry Potter actress Emma Watson.

Francis says of the brief relationship "I have always been an ambitious person and I want to achieve my own notoriety for what I've done. That's why I chose not to pursue it any longer, because I didn't want to be the boyfriend of some child actress.”

Hmm....patronising much? She might very well say she didn't want to be associated with a reality TV wannabe, but hey ho. Francis's interview in Heat does contain some kind words about Emma, thankfully. Apparently, "She's a really cool person."

The Daily Mail ran a story about Emma back in 2008 when she attended the 24th Cartier polo match at Smith's Lawn in Windsor, where she was snapped chatting and laughing with three different fellas. To be fair, talking to three blokes at the polo is hardly cause for an entire news story, but what makes it a tad more interesting is that one of those posh lads is none other than our very own Mr. Boulle! Loving the sweeping hair, Franny.

C xxx

Rihanna shows her dignified side

After being put through one hell of an ordeal by her ex, Chris Brown, Rihanna is showing her dignity and grace speaking about how she doesn't wish him ill.

The Bajan singer told Esquire;

"It's incredible to see how he pulled out of it the way he did. Even when the world seemed like it was against him, you know? I really like the music he's putting out. I'm a fan of his stuff. I've always been a fan. Obviously, I had some resentment toward him for a while, for obvious reasons. But I've put that behind me. It was taking up too much of my time. It was too much anger. I'm really excited to see the breakthrough he's had in his career. I would never wish anything horrible for him. Never. I never have."

She's certainly much more forgiving than I ever would be...

C xxx

The X Factor - Who's Out?

So, after finding out the big twist this year is that each judge has to send home one of their own acts, I've just watched the emotional rollercoaster of ad breaks that is The X Factor elimination show.

So, who's got the boot?

THE OVERS

Eliminated....Jonjo Kerr

The X Factor's first-ever serving soldier sang a lacklustre version of The Kinks' classic 'You Really Got Me'. I really don't know why talent show mentors allow their acts to sing this song. Really. It has about a three-note range, and most singers tend to go extremely flat with it. It's not upbeat enough to get everyone going, nor is it slow and beautiful.

Don't get me wrong, I love the original, it's just that I've never once heard it work in anyone else's hands. Jonjo is a good singer, and he scrubbed up well enough to be this year's housewife's crumpet if he'd managed to make it past this week. Sadly, it just didn't come together for him.


THE GROUPS


Eliminated...2 Shoes

The loud, crazy, bright-pink-lipstick-wearing duo from Essex sang Girls Aloud's 'Something Kinda Oooh', complete with topless dancers and a pink convertible. They weren't bad, and we know already that the two of them have decent pipes. I think the staging overwhelmed them, and they were lost in the pink glitterbomb of campness. Although I did love the fact that at the end of the performance, one of them had her lippy smeared all over her chin and face. Amaze.

THE GIRLS


Eliminated...Amelia Lily

Kelly had a tough job with her decision. The girls is a very strong category, but favourites Janet and Misha were never even going to be considered to leave. That means that only Sophie and Amelia remained. Amelia's performance was good, but not great, while Sophie's was great vocally, but her personality hasn't been put across fully - always an issue for an X Factor contestant. However, Sophie has been a favourite of Kelly's since the very first day - she said that she wanted Sophie to sing at her wedding, remember?!

Give Amelia another year or so, and she might make it further - although judging from her face when Kelly said she was the one to leave, she's not the type to bounce back positively from the rejection.

THE BOYS


Eliminated...James Michael

It had to happen. One of Gary's Scouse trio was leaving. We all knew it. Frankie Cocozza was never going home, he's going to be a massive earner this year - the phones will be ringing off the hook to keep him in as he enthralls a nation of pre-pubescent girls with his 'cheeky chappie with an edge' persona. No matter that his actual singing voice is the weakest of all the boys put through. Craig and Marcus were streets ahead this week, Craig especially so, while James's low-key performance was genuinely interesting and engaging, but just not quite on the same level.

I feel for him, as he seems both lovely and desperate to do well for himself. Seeing as he can actually play an instrument, he might be able to come back as a vaguely credible artist...it all depends on him.

Let me know what you all think about the eliminations. Do you agree? Who's your favourite?

C xxx

Oooh er, Imogen Thomas disses Katie Price

After Danny Cipriani was spotted emerging barefoot from a house with Katie Price, the work insinuated that they had bumped uglies. Apparently, Imogen Thomas, who has a history with rugby player Cipriani, think this too, because she's been lashing out at Katie to friends.

According to The Mirror, Imogen has been saying some lovely things, such as;

"She looks like a transvestite...Out of every woman in the world, her? She's such a slag."

Ouch. I guess the friendship between Imogen and Katie is definitely over, then? The two used to be pals, but they fell out after Imogen posted a video of Katie singing (badly) at a party thrown at Katie's pink Essex mansion. The Cipriani business seems to have finally severed any ties.

I await Katie's reply with baited breath.

C xx

Paul McCartney marries Nancy Shevell on John Lennon's Birthday

Ex-Beatle Paul McCartney married his long-term partner, American heiress Nancy Shevell today at Marylebone Registry Office.

The occasion is full of meaning for the couple, as the registry office is the same place Paul married his first wife, Linda McCartney, 42 years ago. Today is also what would have been the 71st birthday of Paul's bandmate John Lennon.

Best of luck to the happy couple!

C xxx

Kim Kardashian sex tape stays on the market

Even though a mystery bidder offered Vivid Entertainment, who own the rights to the tape, $20 million, they're refusing to sell.

Steve Hirsch, the head guy (ha!) of Vivid, spoke to TMZ and said "Although the offer that we ultimately received was substantial, when I realized that it wasn’t Kim it became less appealing. Kim is a superstar and if it were to be sold, it should be to her."

So guys and girls, if you've got the hots for KK and you haven't yet seen the classic tale of love, romance, and hot, hot sex that's being peddled by Vivid, don't despair! You're still free to download it at your leisure, or rent it in an embarrassing exchange in the back room the video shop your parents used to take you to as a child.

C xxx

I'm just going to leave this here.....

BECAUSE IT'S TOTALLY NORMAL TO WALK AROUND THE POOL IN YOUR UNDERPANTS. What a bellend.

C xx

The X Factor USA

Us lucky Brits are now getting to see the X Factor USA alongside our own original version, just one day after it's aired in the States. I watched the opening show last night, and I have to say I much prefer the UK version.

Maybe it's the way the US version is just that extra bit more OTT, or maybe it's the way you only see about 3 actual auditions in an hour...mostly I think it's a humour thing. I don't like Paula Abdul. I find her grating, in a way akin to feeling sandpaper dragged across my eyeballs. The 'funny' contestants just aren't quite as good...there's something off about the whole business.

I get the feeling that there are more contestants who are trying to boost an acting career or something, rather than actually wanting a career in singing.

Oh, and my major beef? CHERYL COLE. The Cowell said she looked bewildered on the panel...she didn't look bewildered to me! She looked comfortable, happy, funny and sparky. You know - like herself! In contrast, Nic Scherz was like some kind of wet lettuce. She doesn't have Chezza's mix of warmth, bolshiness and success tinged with her working-class roots. Basically, she comes across as fake, and it's jarring.

I really don't think I'll be watching much more of the series...Let me know your thoughts.

C xxx

New No Doubt Album Release Date Pushed Back

Oh, Boo.

I am, and have always been, a huge No Doubt fan. I wrote a while ago about them having a new album scheduled for release this year, but sadly that is not longer going to happen.

The album is still going to be released, but not for a while yet, as the band are trying to make everything perfect. A statement on their official website reads:

“Ideally our new record would be coming out this year but it’s just not ready yet...We don’t want to rush this album just to get it out. This collection of songs means everything to us and our only priority right now is to make sure that it’s the best album we can possibly make. There is still more work for us to do…”

Well, even if it makes me sad that there will be no new No Doubt amazingness this year, I agree that it's better for them to try and create something they're completely happy with.I guess we'll just have to be patient...

C xxx

Big Brother...Are We Feeling It?

So...are we? I mean, I'm watching it, sort of, but it's just kind of falling flat for me. The contestants are so aware of the situation, so aware of the platform they are on that I can't really warm to many of them.

Last night was the first eviction, and Tashie left. I remember her from the BBC documentary 'Music, Money and Hip Hop Honeys', which was actually an excellent doc. However, what I remember about Tashie is her desperation to be famous and the hypocritical nature of some of the things she said and did. So when she first walked into the house, I was already kind of against her.

Don't get me wrong, she was an entertaining enough housemate, and I really like her face (not a fan of the Tashie's nose hate brigade!), but the fact that she openly admitted on Bit on the Side that the first thing she was going to do was use her exposure to push her music by jumping in the studio the day after eviction really, REALLY grated on me.

Added to Tashie's fame-hungry desperado persona are Maisy the wannabe presenter and Alex, who has already appeared on Snog, Marry, Avoid, although the make-under doesn't seem to have stuck. In fairness to Alex, she's actually kind of funny and sweet in a clueless kind of way. Jay was clearly a Geordie Shore reject, ditto Harry, but for Made in Chelsea, obvs.

Maybe I'll enjoy it more when they all get so used to being there that they forget about the cameras, the exposure and their future of doing photoshoots for downmarket rags/staged photo-ops for celeb mags.

I am enjoying this evening's episode, with the lovely soft-focus, soft-rock accompanied fake marriage, and now Tashie's gone, I wont be squirming every time she speaks, cries or moves.

For now, I'm going to keep watching...until the boyf bans me from it, of course!

C xxx

Matthew Fox Gets Off Lightly

After he allegedly drunkenly punched a a female bus driver in the breast and vagina last month, I thought Matthew Fox was for the high jump - you can't go punching people in their sexy bits! It's just not the done thing.

However, it seems that the law for celebs is, once again, different from the law for us plebs. Police officials in Cleveland have decided that no charges will be brought against the LOST actor, although the woman with the (alleged) bruised tit and vandalised lady garden is still going to sue for around $25k.

If there's not enough evidence to bring charges, then I don't think she'll get her dolla. But still, good on her for trying. If he really did punch her in the foof then that's just pathetic. He'll totes never get a girlfriend again.

C xxx

Alexander Skarsgard: 8 second man

Alexander Skarsgard is the one celebrity I still react to like a teenage girl - hysterical giggling, flushed face, incapacity to speak - the works.

So imagine how upset I was when I saw that he's said losing his virginity took him a grand total of...8 seconds!

Of course, he was just joking in an interview with magazine Men's Journal, thank the lord! The lovely Mr. Skarsgard said "That was 2008, I think. Best eight seconds of my life."

On a more serious note, he spoke about how he dislikes being typecast because of his good looks, saying "You tend to get a lot of offers that are, like, the hot guy, and those parts aren't very fun. I hope there's something more to me than my pecs."

I'm pretty sure that he won't be playing the eye-candy forever, but hey...I'll enjoy it while it lasts!

C xxx

Beyoncé has some serious pregnancy cravings!

Ever since she completely upstaged everyone at the VMAs by announcing her pregnancy, Beyoncé's been swanning around Croatia and Italy, being all glamorous and stuff.

Even though she's the human physical embodiment of perfection, she's still succumbed to the one thing that no pregnant woman can control - cravings.

A source has been blabbing about Bey's baby munchies, claiming that she's been chowing down on oreos with gerkhins, milky way bars with hot chilli sauce and bananas dipped in ketchup. Totes vom-worthy.

On top of this, the source also seemed pretty grossed-out that the megastar was breakfasting on croissants filled with melted Dime bars...I think that sounds delicious, and I might even have it for my Sunday breakfast in the morning!

C xxx

All-New Big Brother

I have not watched Channel 5 in years.

Last night, I tuned in of my own free will to watch the launch night of Big Brother 2011. As a fan of BB from the beginning, I felt that it was my duty. I didn't watch too much of Celeb BB (even though I love it) because my other half has been home and banned me from watching it when he was in. We didn't have the internet at this point, so Icouldn't watch it back later, either. Devo'd. I feel as though I genuinely missed out on the Kerry-Lucien-Amy love triangle and the beautiful, if cruelly cut short friendship between Paddy and Sally.

This time, it's going to be different. The other half is back on nights. We have internet access. I'm going to win.

Watching the launch last night, I remembered how much I loved Brian Dowling back when he was an unknown, slightly tubby, screamingly camp stereotype. Now, he looks like a ventriloquist's dummy, with his varnish-coloured face and coiffed to perfection hair. His delivery's pretty wooden too (I'm here all week, thanks guys...). However. I'm still rooting for Brian, and I'm looking forward to seeing him loosen up over the coming weeks.

Sure, the production is flashy and kind of unintentionally choppy, but it works. I especially liked the massive close-ups of the contestants' faces on the side of the house as they made their entrance - talk about unflattering! Every spot, blackhead and wrinkle was on display up there, magnified a hundred times - and man, was it ugly. In an absolutely AMAZING way.

I'm working on a run-down of first impressions of the housemates, which I'll share with you later on today.

C xxx

Back in Business

Ohhh my goodness, I have been away for so long it feels like I've just completely abandoned my beloved blog! Don't worry, I'm still here, still alive, still obsessed with all things celeb.

Since you last heard form me, I've completed a month at Now! magazine, where I learned so much and had some great experiences. I got to interview Charley Speed, the rather sexy judge from Britain and Ireland's Next Top Model, as well as Ellie Redman, the slimming queen of TOWIE.

I managed to do a good few small fashion pieces, as well as film reviews for the mini-site 'love the summer vibes', which was made with Ford Fiesta. I was also allowed to take on a couple of small pieces which appered on the Now! website.

Best of all, I was sent on a (paid!) assignment to do a workout with the Black Eyed Peas trainer and Mr. too-cool-for-school Black-Eyed Pea himself, Taboo! O.K, so Fergie and Will.I.am were supposed to turn up and didn't, and as a consequence the story didn't go in the mag, but hey! Who cares? I got to do some amazing stuff and meet some great people,both on jobs and in the office.

My excuse for the last month is that I'm on a freelance contract working 9-5.30 every day with a hefty lump of travel time, and I've moved house.

Never fear, though. I am back and super excited to get back to being your one-stop-shop for celeb news and gossip! Watch this space for a landslide of updates...

C xxx

Rachel Weisz and Daniel Craig Get Married

Brit actors Rachel Weisz and Daniel Craig got married in a small ceremony in upstate New York on Friday, Rachel's rep has confirmed. The ceremony took place in from of only four people - Rachel and Daniel's children from previous relationships, and two close friends who acted as witnesses.

The pair have only been together for just under  year, after Rachel split with her long-term fella, Black Swan director Darren Aronofsky in November 2010. Rach and Darren have a five year old son, Henry, together.


Daniel was previously married to actress Fiona Loudon from 1992-94, and they have a 19 year old daughter, Ella. Up until early 2010, Daniel was with his long-term partner, Satsuki Mitchell.

Rachel and Daniel's relationship has been kept pretty low-key, other than the couple of occassions they were spotted out together, such as at New York club The Box in February 2011, when they were reportedly all over each other like lovestruck teenagers!

I love both these actors, and I wish them all the best for the future. May they have a long and happy marriage, and end up squabbling over things like who put the butter knife in the jam pot, and why won't Daniel put his socks in the laundry basket instead of leaving them all over the house.

C xx

Corey Monteith Was In Rehab At 19!

Corey Monteith has sensationally revealed that by that age of 19 he had checked into rehab to help conquer his addiction to drugs and alcohol.

The Glee actor spoke to Parade magazine about his difficult past, describing how he was regularly missing school to go and get drunk at 13, and that he dropped out of education altogether at 16.

Corey explained how he used to do "anything and everything - as much as possible." He added "I'm lucky to be alive."

Eventually, Corey's family caught him stealing money from a relative to fund his habit, and demanded that he got the help he needed;

"At that point the family came together and basically said 'If you don’t get yourself under control, we are going to go to the police and press charges'. This became a serious wake up call."

Wow. Hopefully Corey's admission about his history, coupled with his amazing turnaround and success, will inspire other young people who think they might have a problem to get help.

C xx

Kirk and Popey Get Matching Nose Surgery!

Towie's Lauren Pope has just announced on Twitter that she and boyfriend Kirk Norcross have BOTH just had surgery on their noses!

Lauren tweets:
'Some of u prob seen already bt me n Kirk did both go...for nose surgery this wkend n really happy with how well it went!

I had a bump were i walked into a door n used to get filler put in it so now i dont need to, Kirk had it broke.

'Both at home recovering like a pair of plums together with our casts on but got to say ive not had any pain at all just a bit uncomfortable!'

Glad to hear that they both just had little issues to correct, and haven't gone the whole hog and got crazy tiny pinched-up nose jobs! Still, I think it's pretty funny that they went in at the same time, and it's kind of cute, in an Essex-y way.

Oh wait....they got paid to do it, and apparently have loads of magazine deals lined up to show off the surgeon's handywork. Boo.

C xx

Kerry Katona says she WASN'T Dropped by CAN!

Kerry Katona has spoken out on Twitter to clear up her departure from CAN associates.

She tweeted...'Contrary to recent press reports, I was not "dumped" by CAN Associates

'It was my decision to leave, as on a professional level my career was taking a direction that I did not want, nor did I feel was appropriate. Furthermore on a personal level, I felt that my integrity had been compromised...

'I have not taken any drugs in the last year and a half - and if anyone claims otherwise, I will sue without hesitation.'

So while Kerry denies being dumped, she does say that she thought her integrity was being compromised. Perhaps the decision not to attend Amy Childs' birthday bash was made in line with this? CAN makes a point of getting all the celebs on its books to be seen as mates, so if this is not really the case, I can see why Kez wouldn't want to pretend like it is. 


Anyway, it's great to hear that Kerry is still drug-free. I was worried for a second there!


C xx

Is Amy Winehouse Stoned in Serbia?

 

The vocal powerhouse that is Amy Winehouse kicked off her European tour last night in Belgrade, Serbia. However, things didn't go to plan as the singer stumbled abound the stage, struggled to take off her shoes and half-heartedly mumbled her way through her set.

She began with 'Just Friends', the video of which you can see above. Amy arrived for the show an hour late, repeatedly walked off stage, leaving her band and backing singers to do their best without her, and was eventually booed by many of her disappointed fans.

Amy was thought to be doing well with rehab and getting her life back on track. However, this video seems to show that her attempt to get clean has not been successful.

I really hope that she can get herself sorted out. It's such a shame to see anyone in this state, but with Amy's history, it's even more distressing.

C xx

Cheryl Cole and Ashley Move Back In?

The News of the World has a huge story today on Cheryl and Ashley Cole moving back in together at their £5million marital home in Godalming, Surrey.

It reports that the two spent their first night back together just having fun and relaxing in one another's company. Their source says "[Cheryl and Ashley] were saying what a special night it was. They were mucking about like old times just playing pool, smoking and having a few drinks.

"There wasn't any awkwardness between the two of them and they seemed very comfortable together."

The article is very quick to refute any suggestions that the pair actually did the deed during their night together, but does strongly hint that a full-on reunion is just around the corner.

This is just an extension of the 'Cheryl and Ashley Back Together' rumours that have been going around for months now...but it is intriguing, as this is such a bold claim to make. The actual text of the story focuses on this one night, so it doesn't seem as though the pair have actually moved back in together, which is annoyingly misleading.

However, It's much more substantial than previous stories in terms of the suggestions it makes. I guess we'll just have to wait for confirmation/denials from Chez and Ash's teams in the coming days and weeks and watch out for any sneaky paparazzi pics.

I hope it isn't true...because as they say, once a cheater, always a cheater.

C xx

Ellie Goulding Takes A Tumble

Check me out on my Segway!!

Whoa...steady!!

AAAArrrrrrgggghhhhh!

Bugger. Now I've got sand in my knickers.

Own the shame, Ellie. Own it.

Xtina's a Diva? Well Blow Me Down With A Feather!

It seems that all is not well in the land of TV Talent show judges. First there was the saga that was Cheryl Cole's will-she-won't-she X Factor drama, and now we have reports that Christina Aguilera is acting like a total D.I.V.A on the set of new show The Voice. And the other judges aren't happy about it.

First of all, the Stripped singer is thought to be earning a staggering $225,000 per episode, while her fellow judges are on the much lower fee of $75,000...to be fair, I would still take the lower wage. It's not exactly tight.

On top of that, Christina's excessive entourage and demanding personality have got tongues wagging behind her back. Our ever-trusty 'source' says;

"They are all so annoyed by her. Every time she walks away with her entourage, they talk about her behind her back. She holds people up and never apologizes. When the cameras are rolling, she literally won't shut up. It is all about her."

Oooh. Bitchy.

C xx

Kerry Katona is CANned by her Agency

Dear shy, sweet, retiring Kerry Katona has reportedly been dropped from her PR company CAN Associates (see what I did with the title there).

CAN picked Kerry up after she split with no-good hubby Mark Croft last year. Kez cleaned herself up, got off the booze and drugs, lost weight and seemed to really have sorted her life out. She also has a new show on ITV2, so I wonder what could have caused the rift?

Well, the word is that Kez refused to attend the birthday party of fellow CAN-er, TOWIE's Amy Childs, choosing instead to go out on a drinking sesh with her friends. She was apparently boozing for six hours, and ended up crashed out over a luggage trolley in her hotel. Sounds like a good night to me!

Anywayz, seeing as all CAN's other clients, such as Peter Andre and Elen Rivas were in attendance at the Essex glamour girl's b-day celebrations, we can pretty much assume that Kerry would have been expected to be there too. Her defiance is currently being blamed as the reason for her deaparture, especially as CAN are being so tight-lipped about the whole situation...

C xx

Frank Lampard and Christine Bleakley Engaged

After the rumour mill exploded earlier this afternoon, Frank Lampard's agent has released an official statement:

"I am pleased to say that Christine Bleakley has accepted Frank Lampard's surprise engagement proposal here in LA. They are obviously both delighted but there are no immediate wedding plans & the couple will not be making any further comment..."

Exciting stuff for the couple, and i wish them the best. Let's hope that this one stays the course and doesn't descend into Ryan Giggs superinjunction territory...

C xx

Kim Marsh Tells Twitter Critics To Stick It

After the terrible loss of her stillborn son Archie, born at 21 weeks, and the traumatic struggle for the health of her daughter, born early at 33 weeks, Kym Marsh was in no mood to entertain those on twitter who questioned her decision to bottle-feed baby Polly.

Due to the fact of Polly's early birth, Kym has said she cannot breastfeed her daughter as she is not producing enough milk. However, this revelation seems to have provoked a backlash from pro-breastfeeding activists. One tweeted that Kym was choosing "vanity over [her] children" and their health, with one going so far as to suggest that Kym cared more for mintaining the look of her boob job than nurturing her children.
 
Kym hit back at the comments, saying "Shut up you absolute idiot. You know nothing so go be bitter elsewhere!"


She added "I stayed in bed for three months to bring my baby into this world after losing one so do not dare EVER criticise me. For your information you idiot I did breastfeed for as long as I could, I wasn't producing enough for her to come of her iv and was advised by HER consultant to give formula so we could get her off the drip, not that I need to explain myself to u."


After the spat, Kym messaged her supportive followers, saying "Guys getting a bit tired of nasty pieces of work on twitter. So sad they have to hide behind a computer! Questioning my dedication to Polly! Done everything in my power to get my little girl here. Some nasty pieces of work, honestly."

She's right. Only sad cases would criticise her when she has worked so hard to bring a heathy baby into the world. Breast feeding is best if it is possible, but it it really awful to criticise someone for trying their best and not being to do something which is so publicly proclaimed as the ultimate bonding mechanism between mother and child.

Best of luck in bringing up little Polly...I'm sure you'll be amazing!

C xx

You're Not Fooling Anyone.

Look at this. Look at it. Vile. After his string of affairs (including one with his best mate's missus), it seems that all is forgiven and forgotten between Toni and John Terry. Frolicking in the sea and under waterfalls in Abu Dhabi, Toni looks in great shape, but seriously bad form.

This is such a fakey-fake 'show of strength' organised paparazzi set-up, I actually vommed a little bit in my mouth when I saw these. This may also partly have been because if Toni's swimsuit/stripper outfit was any smaller, you'd be able to see what she had for breakfast with her legs wrapped around Johnny boy like that.

Just show that you're affected by these scandals, show that you're a pair of normal human beings with feelings, rather than a pair of stage-ready automatons hiding their emotions for financial gain. It's so tacky, and not in the fun way that made WAGS so fun back in 2006!

C xx

P.S I thought behaviour like this was illegal in public in Abu Dhabi?

Bret Lockett: 'Physical' Kim Kardashian Relationship Not Actually All That Physical.

After claiming that he had a five-month affair with newly-engaged Kim Kardashian, American Football player Bret Lockett has admitted that he has never even met her.

WHAT. A. TWAT.

He does claim that he has explicit texts and pictures from KK that he can release whenever he wants. However, he hasn't done so as yet...come on Bret, I dare you! If it's true,we're going to need more than the texts released so far, which were completely boring and not even dated.

I call bullshit, but Bret, if you want to prove me wrong, then release something more convincing. Thanks.

C xx