Dear Robert DeNiro, You're An Idiot. Love, The Donald.

After some not-so-veiled criticism of Donald Trump by Robert DeNiro at the Tribeca Film Festival, The Donald has hit back, insulting Robert's intelligence.

The row started over Donald's continued (and bizarre, and unfounded) assertion that Barack Obama is not an American. He is demanding to see the President's birth certificate in order to ensure that he is actully allowed to be in the White House. I mean, really? REALLY? Do you honestly think, Donald, that no-one in government has checked all this out? And also, holy vaguely-concealed racism, Batman!

Anyway. DeNiro called Trump out on this madness, and not Donald has responded in true playground style by saying of Robert; "Well he’s not the brightest bulb on the planet. I’ve been watching him over the years and I like his acting, but you know in terms of when I watch him doing interviews and various other things, we’re not dealing with Albert Einstein."

Just to be clear, I side with DeNiro. And I think he's a pretty intelligent guy. Donald is just acting like a petulant child.

C xx

Feel My Wrath, ITV Bosses.

X Factor bosses at ITV are shaking in their boots about Simon Cowell's confirmed departure, and Cheryl Cole's almost-confirmed departure. There are currently rumours flying that they intend to drop both Louis Walsh AND Dannii Minogue from the judging panel in order to bring in a completely fresh start.

Well, here's what I say to that: NO! Those two are the best things about the X Factor! Louis' totally irrelevant, snidey comments are pure gold, while Dannii has been the stand-out judge since she started. She offers great critique in a fair manner, underplaying her bias for her own acts by making sure to give credit where it's due to others, and criticism to her own. And just look at her hair! It's a chameleonic masterpiece, in a totally different style every week!

Chezza's shine is not as dazzling as it used to be, and Simon has gone soft. He's no longer Mr. Nasty, and to be frank, I'm fed up of his and Cheryl's cosy little whispering together act. Urgh. ITV, get your act together, and stop with the panic stations! Offering Cheryl double money won't keep her in the country, and throwing Dannii and Louis to the sharks is no way to improve your situation. MAN UP.

C xxx